What should I do – drinking and kids around?

My sis in law is having a 4th of July party in which there will be a significant amount of drinking involved. She has three kids and drinks around them. My husband and I however quit drinking because he has problems with it and we don’t want it around our newborn Baby. I don’t want to make her mad by not coming but I don’t want the baby around drunk people. How do I tell her we can’t come without hurting her feelings?

I also choose not to expose my daughter to drunkness. Her dad had a big problem with it too – but he was not successful with quitting. He is now my ex.

Personally, I would just tell them that you decided to quit drinking and don’t want to be tempted to restart. … Some people get insulted when you refuse to drink with them. It isn’t worth stooping to their level, so it’s best to just state that this isn’t a part of your life any more and let them deal with it. I am not saying your sister in law is like that. I just know how hard it was for my ex when he tried to quit and people got mad at us for being “too good for them”.

So you pretty much just have 3 options: 1, make an appearance then excuse yourselves after a few minutes (not worth it in my book); 2, make up a lie – like say the baby is sick or you are tired or something; or 3, Just tell them the truth. Maybe you will get lucky and she will invite you to stop by earlier in the day, before they start drinking. If not – at least you won’t have to spend the next 18 yrs making excuses.

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